It’s simple.
Your language affects your body language, your mood, your attitude, your behaviour, your decisions, your outcomes, and pretty much your whole life.
Yes, it’s that simple!
When having conversations with people, I pay close attention to words they use to describe themselves and situations.
The coach in me likes to peep through making sure the person I’m having a conversation with is “ok”, aside from the daily challenges we all face.
I’m going to use some examples today to perhaps trigger your thoughts about the language you use daily, the meaning you give to certain words, and how they affect your decisions and actions.
Oh this is going to be fun!
Many of you will notice that you often use a “limiting” language without realizing how you’re shaping your own future by doing so.
You might want to fine tune using some words after your awareness of them, take control and make the difference in the areas you would like to improve.
In recent conversations, I’ve heard:
1. “I want x, y, and z and I’ve been working on myself to achieve them but it’s hard when people are closed off and are not willing to open up or help”.
2. “It’s great that you love running. I’ve never been good at any sport”.
3. “I wish I could’ve done more but my life has always been about being safe and logical and it works for me”.
Before you read on, stop and think how do YOU think these people are changing their behaviour with the language they’re using. It would be a great way to test yourself to see if you can point it out.
Ok, now, here we go.
Coach T is in da house! (Love saying that. Cheesy, I know!)
1. “I want x, y, and z and I’ve been working on myself to achieve them but it’s hard when people are closed off and are not willing to open up or help”.
This man is very well aware of his goals and dreams and also very determined to achieve them. However, he feels that he does not have control over the outcome because he believes an outside source is in charge of his goals. He believes others have a strong effect in his life. He feels helpless.
Question: What needs to change for him to move forward?
Once he becomes aware of his language, he’ll realize that although he’s taking action towards his goals, he’s giving his power away with his language and thoughts. Once he aligns his actions with his thoughts and the words he uses to describe his life, he’ll soon realize that he IS in full control of his life and not others.
2. “It’s great that you love running. I’ve never been good at any sport”.
This person has labeled herself as a non-runner and a non-athletic person based on an old belief while repeating it enough times, that now she even believes this is not part of her lifestyle. Deep down she really would love to give it a try by admiring mine but she fears she’ll fail and guards herself with her language.
Question: What’s the first step she needs to take to break the old belief?
The very first step here is, of course, changing her language consciously by stop labelling herself. You’ve probably heard this before that anything that comes after “I am” you become. So she has to become mindful about how she describes herself because whatever you say about yourself, after repeating it enough times, you will believe you are and therefore become that person.
3. “I wish I could’ve done more but my life has always been about being safe and logical and it works for me”.
This woman has relied on only two values to live by: safety and logic. While we have numerous values to live by, she has limited herself only to two of them!
Question: How can she awaken and explore all her values that have been dormant for so long?
Fear can limit us in many ways and long after fear inducing incidents in our lives, the effects still linger on in our language. Therefore, the language must change to set free of such limitations. To explore her other values, she must identify her fears first and find her path back and set up new goals. She can also write a list of values she’d like to identify with more and was scared to do so in the past and use them in her daily language.
It wasn’t that hard now, was it?
It’s so much easier to detect the language in others than your own.
But don’t go for perfection.
This is not about being perfect but about opening yet another door to walk through to get closer to your goals.
Start today and change your language. You’ll thank yourself later.
Once you read the blogs and the newsletters please leave your comments and questions in the comment boxes under the blogs. I will be reading and responding to every single one of them personally. Remember your questions and comments help others as well. You never know who else is reading them and can benefit from your words. Thank you for being part of the progress.
