There is a lesson in everything: any action and reaction.
I’ll get straight to the story as I know the title has created some suspense already!
Here we go:
I have been going the same coffee shop almost every day for the past 3.5 – 4 years to either work, meet friends, or just read a book by myself.
The people at the coffee shop are very friendly and hospitable and I know almost each and every one of them pretty well.
It’s my safe and happy little place to go to on weekdays mostly.
Last week, I was going there to meet my friend to work while sitting outside enjoying the weather.
There are two tables outside and one of them was vacant.
I got there earlier and as I sat down not even for a minute, an older man in his 60’s came out and tapped me on my shoulder and told me this was his table I was sitting at and I better get up!
I looked at the top of the table to be sure there was nothing on it to indicate it was taken or reserved and I told him that.
He got really angry and said: “I asked you politely now I’m gonna tell you to get the F*** up!”
I told him: “That was polite?!”
Right after I said that, within seconds, his anger went from 0 to 5000!
He began yelling profanities and throwing my purse from the table on the ground and pulling the table towards himself, breaking a piece of it and throwing a chair too!
He would not stop yelling and swearing at me so I told him to watch his mouth and that’s when it happened…
He rushed towards me, stood over my head, as I was still sitting down, and raised his hand to hit me!!!
I made a split second decision and stood up and went right up to his face and began yelling as loud as he was and said: “Hit me and I’ll call the cops and then I’ll kill you!” (Of course, I’m not a murderer but I had to make him believe that there is a possibility!)
He stood still for a second, realizing I was not scared of him, then he turned around and began throwing the chair again and swearing even more saying he knows “Jackie”, who is apparently an important person at the company, and he will ban me from coming there ever again.
The young man who works there and was in the back room came outside to see what all the commotion was about. He and a young girl were the only ones working that day and the manager was not on site. He tried talking to the old man but it didn’t go very far.
The old man’s friend, who was inside buying their coffee, came outside but didn’t say anything to his friend and just sat down!
At this point the couple who were sitting at the next table, watching it all like it was entertainment, left so I grabbed my stuff and moved over to the other table.
As walking by, a beautiful young girl told him to calm down but he was talking back to her too. She said he could hear him from two blocks away!
She then came over to me asking if I was ok and wanted to take me for a drink as I was shaking and tears were coming down my face. I had to decline as I was waiting for my friend and said many thanks to her and gave her my card as people like her are quite rare.
When my friend arrived and I was telling her what had happened, he kept staring at me with a victorious smile. It was then that I asked my friend to move her head to the side so I had a good view of his face and took a photo of him.
Because I was pretty shook up, my friend suggested we go someplace else and I said: “HECK NO!” I will not run away. That’s exactly what he wants. I’m going to find a way to stop this violent man from abusing and humiliating women in such a way. I have to do my part.”
A few minutes later, the young girl who was working inside and had seen the entire incident walked out to him and asked him not to come back to this coffee shop again. Her face was flushed and her voice shaky but she still took a stand and went back inside.
When he finished his coffee, he went in and told her he’s gonna get her fired and she MUST apologize to him and then left.
As all this was taking place, I finished writing an email to both the manager of the store as well as the regional manager and reported the whole incident and attached his photo.
In 26 years of living in Vancouver, I have never come across such hatred. I’ve seen pain, pessimism, anger, depression, etc. but nothing like this.
You know what hurt me the most from this experience?
You may be shocked to hear it but it wasn’t him. He’s only a man in massive pain with no dignity, self esteem and respect who preys on only women to make himself feel better.
However, there were over 40 – 50 people walking by who stood still watching the entire thing without moving a muscle, including the couple at the other table!
This was entertainment to these bystanders.
I couldn’t believe what I was witnessing. Even after it was all done and over, not one person from the ” sheep herd” came over to see if I’m ok.
When did the meaning of a “being human” change to hiding behind computers, so-called “intelligent” discussions about world issues at gatherings, and of course, staying silent as a bystander?
When did protecting their fears and staying under the radar become more important than taking action towards something that is obviously wrong on so many levels?
I felt so helpless and alone amongst so many people.
The young blonde and the 20 year old barista were the only two who took a stand for me: My angels.
Life matters when you take action and take a stand for others and for yourself otherwise you’re just another “under the radar” person soon to be forgotten.
Is that how you want to be remembered?
We often watch the celebration of “heroes” on the news such as: a woman running into a burning house to save an elderly couple, or a man throwing himself in harm’s way to save a teenager, etc. You know exactly what I’m talking about.
Rightfully so they are heroes as in a moment of their own immense fear, they take ACTION for another human being.
Why such acts are so rare in our society that when it happens they make it to the evening news?!
This should happen every minute of every day.
It’s called awareness.
You are here for a reason and it’s not just for you. WAKE UP!
Fortunately my story doesn’t end there.
I went back a few days later to meet a client at the same coffee shop. I was nervous and did not want to run into this man again.
As soon as I walked in, the staff and the manager were so happy to see me and came over to greet me. They offered my usual coffee on the house and said: “Please keep coming here and not leave us. We really like you.”
I was so touched and felt so appreciated.
My “angel barista” had the biggest smile on her face too. Standing up for one another had given us both a priceless experience.
The manager told me that my email was very powerful and she forwarded it to the higher people in charge and “Jackie”, the friend he kept threatening us with, had told him to never come back to this store ever again. YAAAY! 😀
I bet he will think twice next time before raising his hand and voice on another woman, at least in public.
My story has an incredible ending now its reward will last forever.
I’m going to ask you now if you have a similar stories to tell, share it here below and your chosen action to make a difference.
One person CAN. Be that person.
Please leave your comments and answers in the comment boxes under the questions. Remember, you can help others as someone in need may be reading them and can benefit from your words. Thank you for being part of the progress.
